We now interrupt your regularly scheduled reality...
See, I've been reading a book set in Crimea, which makes me want to research the history and see how the Greeks, Turks, and Russians all ended up there/were driven out of there.
My guess would be a series of crimes, hence the region's name. (And yes, next time you see me, you can hit me for saying that. Justice ought to be done.)
I'm mentally pummeling your shoulder right now. How does Nicole put up with you?
I'm a masochist.