Rent

When medical bills come for various items related to cancer follow-up, I like to remind myself that the body is like a house for the soul, so these are basically rent payments. And I am rather large, so it only makes sense that the rent should be more than for most bodies of a similar age.

The one thing I don't understand is why bodies in worse condition invariably cost more. I mean, would you really want to pay more for a house which had had a portion amputated? How does that make sense?

Perhaps a health care reform bill will soon pass and I'll be able to work off medical bills by spending several hours a week filling out forms, or waiting on hold on the phone. That kind of sweat-equity system is appealing to me. In the current private system, the insurance people I talk to refer me to other people, who don't appear to be at work any time I think of calling and never respond to messages. As Dr. Horrible once wisely said, the status is not quo.

The best possible solution, of course, would involve insurance companies and government working together to deport all sick or damaged persons to Thailand, Singapore, and other areas with high medical standards for relatively low medical costs. But until they pool together the funds to deport me, I'll stay right here and get needles to the arm from well-paid American citizens, thank you very much.

They'll only drip a little.