Quidditch Team Outing

My Quidditch team is going to see Harry Potter 6 tonight, and I'm afraid to say that will probably be the high point of our season.

The Provo Provokers used to be one of the most feared squads in Intermountain Quidditch, but this year has been a disaster. Our top-rated blindside Beater got suspended for the season after getting called for Bumphing, Blurting, and Blatching in our second match; our Chasers have all put on weight since last year; our Seeker got addicted to NyQuil; last year's openside Beater became a Jain, which has thrown off his game a bit; and (let's be honest) my cheerleading isn't what it used to be--all of which has contributed to our second-to-last finish in the conference, just above Unreal Salt Lake.

Here's to hoping the movie is worth the mediocre season. If it's not, that's OK...I'll just cry myself to sleep.

Again.